“Many happy returns of the day, dude. Look what I bought for you?”
“Oh! “Manhattan Beach”! I was so looking forward to read this.”
“I know, I know. When we were in Goa, you read “A visit from the Goon squad” even in the dim light of that open air bar where the group was playing Beatles. I tried to read it when you were snoring, and I could not fall asleep. It was my magic wand for falling asleep in ten minutes. That was the moment I knew what your birthday gift is going to be.”
“Well, thank you for the birthday special. The remark about my reading choice, I mean. And thank you for straying away from your Beach Read and Eleanor & Park.”
“Oh, you are welcome. It was a fun trip to that section in Crossword where you get to sit very easily. The books were also looking absolutely untouched, brand new. I got an idea to write a book, as a matter of fact – tentatively named as “Hundred ways to get good night’s sleep.””
“Oh, come on. That should be the name of the other section where Fault in the Star and Love Story reside. With a subtitle of “A million ways for the guy to get the girl in the end.” How can people read hundred books where two people are in love, and then get out of love and get in love again in the end. The guy hesitantly touches the girl, the girl uses a million adjectives and adverbs to describe the feeling that a million other protagonists have used in the past. Some light sex, not described in the book if the book is a light romcom, described in detail if it is an erotic romcom, and all the combinations in between.”
“Yes, of course, you need more plotless novels where the protagonists debate about the meaning of life for 580 pages and do not find it in the end. Or there are interweaving stories that bore you to death with their mundane narrative, and protagonists that are losers – almost always. What is it about loser that those writers like? Besides the awards I mean.”
“I know, only the romance novelists know how to take a beaten up plot, change a little bit about the settings, give protagonists features that have never been tried before, use the “Romancing the beat” formula, and roll in the money.”
“I guess that’s enough about our reading habits dude. What is your birthday resolution? Well, you are sixteen now, right?”
“You are so sweet. You know girls never like to grow up, right? I don’t mind being wise and grown up. I am going to be twenty seven, thank you. Of course, as a guy, you are not supposed to remember that. It is the prerogative of the girls to remember everything about their father, then about their boyfriend/husband, and then about their kids. That’s an outline of the nice path that a girl’s life is supposed to take.”
“But I am sure you enjoy that right? What is better than to care about people you love.”
“Why does it have to only be a girl who cares? Why not the boy for a change? Anyway, to answer your question, my birthday resolution this year is to take some more time for myself. I have to try hard to do that because of all those things going on with my career. And of course I not Amrita to water my plants every day, and be happy to take care of husband and in laws.”
“Oh you are binging LitFic movies now. But more seriously, it makes total sense take that time out for yourself, girl. Life is too short to be indulged in trivialities.”
“You mean trivialities like romance novels?”
“Haha, not that one. Can I have my birthday kiss now?”